This blog contains, but isn't limited to, graphic sexual horror, BDSM, sex, robots, science, food, rock climbing, bouldering, politics and general bric-a-brac. Not suitable for children under 18. Honestly, probably not suitable for most humans.

## Wednesday, December 18, 2013

### I did a thing! (Pole Progression)

Like all spoiled little girls, whenever I ask Daddy for something, if I can give him a "legitimate" reason I need it, he'll almost always get it.  The excuse for a dance pole was a thinly veiled one, and actually wasn't enough to get him to want one.  So, I did what every little girl does with a job: used my own money to get it.

Unfortunately, M0co wasn't too pleased I went and did this.  "Baby, money's tight this time of year," he explained, or "You'll just stop using it after a month."  To be fair,  M0co's baseline of judgment is accurate- I do tend to start many a project to just push them literally under the living room table with my yoshi pinata and my sewing kit.  But, like a little girl begging for a puppy, I responded- "Don't worry, Daddy, I promise to use it everyday! It's not a waste of money or time! It's fun for me! and it'll be fun for you!"

To make good on my promise of it being entertaining for him, he made me dance for him several times.  He'd throw on some slow jams on Pandora, sit in Daddy's chair and just watch.  It gave me a mini thrill to be the center of his attention, even if I didn't feel like I knew what I was doing.  Every time I danced for him, it ended with me crawling the our hallway--a fistful of hair in his hand-- to be fucked roughly in bed.

I think I can safely say that M0co has grown fond of having a pole in the house :)

For the last month (the only month) of having a pole here, I've been working really hard on my basic invert.  I'm happy to say that I nailed it finally!  I guess my strength has improved greatly in the last month *flex*

 My first basic invert! One month of practice
I'm happy to see progress in myself sometimes, it's easy to lose sight.  I want to say that I'll post monthly updates, but that could be the biggest lie I've ever written.  My goal currently is to at least post progress pics with a timeline.

## Saturday, December 14, 2013

### ((Ricky Spanish))

Oh, when she’s angry, she is keen and shrewd!
She was a vixen when she went to school.
And though she be but little, she is fierce.
-William Shakespeare

I'm a fairly introverted character-- I rather spend my nights at home, chained to a bed or crawling around with a bundle of rope in my mouth in an attempt to seduce M0co into playing with me.  Going to an event that isn't one that M0co is running or presenting at almost never happens.  I'm a nerd loner, often preferring to play on the internet or read a book.

but when I have rope in my hands, I become a different person.  I feel strong, charismatic, and even a bit dangerous.  I become...Ricky Spanish.

The name is actually one of the characters that Roger plays on "American Dad".  He's kind of a dirt bag human being slash alien with a mullet and vest.  Here's a small compilation from that episode:

I'm not saying I'm a complete dirt bag.  But that attitude! I know that feel, bro!  Like Roger putting on an outfit, being the top in a scene just...it does something to me.  It changes me.  I'm no longer just a 5'3" 130-something lb. little slave girl whose constant fear of rejection tends to keep me from making any moves on people of interest.  I become something else completely- a snarky, brave, little sadist who has the strength and ferocity to take what she wants, with consent, of course.

Here are some shots of ((Ricky Spanish)) in action taken at a recent event.  IrisEnchanted was nice enough to let me use her-- doesn't she make the cutest faces?

## Thursday, December 12, 2013

### Snow Day

Well, the entire Metro area closed down yesterday for about an inch of snow.  I'm not complaining- I got the day off and got to take some pretty pictures.

It finally dawned on M0co that in order to sell his rope, he would have to sell out.  Okay, maybe not sell out per say, but he would have to cater to his clientele a little bit more than he was--he was going to have to start taking pretty pictures.  So, armed with a decently good camera and a very basic knowledge and skillset of photoshop and lighting, M0co's been making some very beautiful images.

 M: Me Rigger/Rope/Photographer: M0co

 M: Me Rigger/Rope/Photographer: M0co

 M: me Rigger/Rope/Photographer: M0co

Look at me! In all my majesty! It was ridiculously cold with no underwear on.  Never realized how much heat genitalia produce.  Our newest room-mate, Trip, shrugged and told me in the most matter-of-fact way, "Years of evolution has ensured us warm genitalia."

It still feels like a sham to call myself a model.  I'm really just a thing that goes inside another thing-- the rope and M0co are doing all the hard work. I just have to not break for 10-15 minutes, which is pretty easy without someone hitting and choking me.

Kimono in the snow is something I've been wanting to do for a while, despite my intense hatred for all things cold and snow.  As much as I complained, I have to admit, I do like these photos.  Which is rare because I kinda hate all photos of me that aren't of me playing.

This shot was taken in my backyard more or less, in which "kids" (the person in question was over 18) were out building snow people, neighbors were locked away in their apartments, and there were puppy paw prints everywhere.  If the shots were a little wider, you could totally see the apartment complex or the townhouses.  Good thing we know how to crop the hell out of things.

Strangely fitting, I really missed having kannukis in my gote for this shoot. I know the latest trend has been to banish the evil kannuki because it tends to increase the risk of nerve damage by a lot, but...I like not falling out of a gote.

## health

noun, often attributive \ˈhelth also ˈheltth\
: the condition of being well or free from disease
: the overall condition of someone's body or mind
: the condition or state of something

Ah, I love m-w.com so much- it’s really come one of my favorite websites on the internet (shhh, please don’t tell M0cojute.com!)  Above is a very basic definition of health.  In terms of rope bottoming, all three definitions are highly applicable.  I particularly like the second and third definition.

Overall, health is something that should be of high concern to everyone, not just rope bottoms.  Knowing your health status is ultra important for living day to day.  Although, it’s not quite a skill, physical and mental health is something we can all improve with a couple of tips and hints.

So when we talk about health, generally speaking, what are we talking about?  For me, it’s important to discuss what health is NOT about.  Health is not about being thin. REPEAT, HEALTH IS NOT ABOUT BEING THIN.  I think that a lot of society and culture has it heavily ingrained in folks that being thinner means you’re automatically healthier and that couldn’t be more wrong!  The emphasis on health, when it comes to rope bottoming, has nothing to do with how much a person weighs.  It has everything to do with your lifestyle and mental state.

To me, and to several rope bottoms in my community, health is a combination of the general condition of the mind and body.  Good health for rope bottoming would have an overall positive condition; bad would be an overall negative condition.  These definitions seem pretty loose and for good reason; general health is something only you can determine of yourself.

Physical Health

My physical health is just a small fraction of my health, but is still incredibly important.  I do what I can in order to keep healthy.  Small things like staying hydrated, working out regularly, get physical check ups, and sleep.  You’d be surprised how things like actually drinking enough water or sleeping a full 8 hours a night will change how you physically (and mentally, but we’ll get to that) feel.
I know earlier I said that preferred the second and third definitions of ‘health’ in comparison to the first- it’s because of the word ‘disease’. Yes, you should not have the flu or suddenly come down with a case of E. bola virus when bottoming in rope.  The immune system is too busy fighting off infection, why are you fighting your immune system?  When you’re sick, you should let your body rest.  The rope can always wait.

(Here comes my rant!)

My problem with the use of the word disease is that BDSM is often equated with sexuality.  Diseases equated with sexuality are STDs.  You don’t need to be free from STDs to a good rope bottom.  I have had many a rope bottom tell me, somewhat apprehensively, that they have z, y, or z STD, as if that would make me not want to play with them.  STDs have a really terrible stigma about them, as if a person is dirty or no good for having them.  It’s really no different from catching the chicken pox (No, really, look it up, varicella-zoster virus, which causes Chickenpox and Shingles, is a herpes virus.  Guess what else is a herpes virus?)   While I do appreciate when people tell me these things because it means they’re being honest, it has absolutely no bearing on their skills as a rope bottom.

(end rant, thanks for hanging on for that!)

Physical injuries are something of which to also be aware. Our play party nights often include various other forms of play that may eventually make being a rope bottom more difficult.  If I do an intense whipping scene in which my skin is broken, I probably shouldn’t do a rope scene shortly afterward.  Anything that takes a toll on the body or mind will affect your ability to bottom in rope.  Things to be cognizant about:
• What plans do I have for the rest of the night in terms of rope or other play
• Do I have any broken skin or bruises that will change how rope feels on my body
• What is my mental state like?  Am I still in headspace from a previous scene?  Will this affect my headspace in rope?

Mental Health
The overall emotional and mental state actually seem to be a bigger part of health that most people forget.  Your mental health dictates most of what you do day to day.  The difficulty of this is being able to judge your mental and emotional state in terms of playing.  It’s such an individual thing- for example, if I’m particularly upset or emotional, I love bottoming for single tails and tears, but absolutely cannot bottom in rope.  If my mind is even slightly foggy, if I think I may be slightly manic or depressed, I stay away from playing because I never know how it’ll affect my mental state.
I don’t have much advice for mental health because I am not mental health professional.  I highly recommend really getting to know yourself and being aware of how your mood affects your play and day to day life.  Things to be cognizant about:
• How am I feeling today?
• How will I feel if I have a rope scene with ____________?
• Am I prepared to handle going into a headspace?
• Am I prepared to handle it if this scene doesn’t go well?

I’m sure there are tons of other questions you can (and should!) ask yourself about.  This is a very highly individualized processed, so please do what best suits you!
Happy bottoming!

## Wednesday, October 9, 2013

### An Eye-opener: MBE Orlando

I have a lot of love/hate for performances, particularly if I'm involved in said performance.  So when we got invited to Morpheous' Bondage Extravaganza in Orlando, I had heavy reservations.  Being able to play in rope at a play party is one thing, but performing in front of people, in front of cameras, for all of the free internet to see?  I was definitely scared.  Not a little nervous, not a couple of butterflies, but full-out "I hope I don't vomit in front of everyone in The Woodshed" fears.

So why do that to myself?

M0co is an amazing rigger- everything he's learned in such a short time, but not everyone knows how skilled he is because he can't travel.  He's not a big name presenter yet.  So MBE seemed like an excellent opportunity for him to show the world what he can do.  Plus, it was a nice chance to meet other riggers and rope bottoms in the US.

Sometimes I feel like I fall short of someone as skilled as M0co is.  I don't know where or why these fears are there, or if they are fears that all rope bottoms have from time to time.  but I worry that, on stage with cameras rolling, will be the time I fail to live up to what he needs from a bottom.  and then to have to do it multiple times in a night?  I was prepared for the worst of the worst- that I wouldn't make it.  That I would have to throw in the towel and M0co wouldn't be able to get his name out there.

MBE came and went.  and I survived.

 A particularly stressful hogtie by M0co

Actually, I did much more than survive.  I was able to do the three time slots we were assigned, plus two extras, one with M0co and one with Murphy Blue.  As strange as it feels to toot my own horn, I did pretty damn well. I was able to be that flexible stunt bottom that can take a crazy amount of stress and strain.  M0co even praised me at the end of the night ("You're a gangster, baby!")

I never considered myself a good bottom before, not that I thought of myself as bad.  I just...was.  When people complimented me in the past, I always just brushed it off as people being polite or I try to guide the praise towards M0co since he's doing the tying.  I never felt qualified to teach someone about bottoming and, to a certain extent, I still don't, but I do have a better understanding about what I'm capable of.  I can't wait to see how I progress in the future and I know I can only get better.

I can't wait to see how M0co and I grow :)

## en·dur·ance

noun \in-ˈdu̇r-ən(t)s, -ˈdyu̇r-, en-\
Definition of ENDURANCE1: permanence, duration <the endurance of the play's importance>2: the ability to withstand hardship or adversity; especially : the ability to sustain a prolonged stressful effort or activity <a marathon runner's endurance>3: the act or an instance of enduring or suffering <endurance of many hardships>

I think it’s agreed by a majority of rope bottoms that endurance, especially in tricky or stressful positions, is a great skill to have.  Above I posted a basic definition of endurance that I lifted from m-w.com.  I think definition two and three are most applicable.  Or maybe I just really like seeing the word ‘suffering’.

I posed this question to a local rope bottom group:
How do you increase your endurance when it comes to rope?  Got any tips or tricks?

I just want to comment that my rope bottom community has some amazing bottoms with excellent insight.  The first thing I noticed in every response is that not a single person said “It’s something you either have or you don’t.”  I think it’s very easy for people to give into the idea that you’re either a good rope bottom or you aren’t.

What I love about endurance is that it’s something that can be built up; it’s a skill that can increase with practice and time.  When I started in bondage, I didn’t have much endurance at all.  I couldn’t maintain stressful positions physically or mentally-- and yes, there is a huge mental component to endurance.  If you practice regularly, you can up your endurance in rope pretty easily.

My community came up with an awesome list of things that really have increased their time in rope.  Here are several awesome tips and tricks that seem to be helping us and I hope they help others as well.

• Stretching and exercise: Doing regular stretching, yoga and/or exercise helps improve flexibility and health.  A rope bottom doesn’t have to be gumby or all-star athlete Hope Solo, but doing stretches helps warm up the muscles and body before play.  You are more prone to injuries if you haven’t warmed up muscles beforehand.  Exercises that really help with rope bondage (especially suspension) include things that keep you off balanced, like bosu balls, exercise balls and slacklines.  These engage the same core muscles as does a really tough bondage position or suspension.  Tifereth has a whole plethora of exercises that she has demonstrated in her bottoming classes- hopefully, I will be able to put up a post (with visuals) for those interested.  I think Tifereth says it best (paraphrasing), you absolutely cannot hope that your Rigger or Rope Top can cover the deficits in you if you didn’t put work in.  A rope Top puts in hours and hours of work and practice in order to be a safe rigger- who are you to not put your share of work in as well? Yoga also has the added benefit of teaching you how to breathe in difficult positions which brings us to...
• Breathing: Breathing came up in almost every single response I saw when I posted this question.  Even and slow breathing helps keep the body and mind relaxed.  When I first started in bondage, I was notoriously bad for holding my breath and not being able to prolong a stressful tie. So keeping calm by really regulating breathing patterns is important.  Some people are good at reminding themselves to not hold their breath.  If you ever find yourself in something stressful, it’s always good to take a deep breath in and out and see if that helps.
• Practice: Practicing in rope lab mode on a fairly regular basis will help your body and mind get used to challenges.  Just like a rigger needs to practice in order to maintain or improve muscle memory and fluidity, a rope bottom needs to practice as well.  Being in lab mode also tends to keep your mind from going into a headspace/subspace because you know you’re practicing and not playing.  I try to practice several times a week, even if it’s something very simple like tying a futomomo on myself.
• Communication: Learning to communicate is high on almost everyone’s list of good bottoming skills.  Proper communication between a Top and bottom prior, during, and after play will help improve endurance and stamina.  One thing that I cannot stress enough is that asking for a readjustment in rope is not Topping from the bottom! You are being a responsible bottom by letting your Top know that something isn’t right- it’s keeping both of you safe. Communication includes:
• Communication with the Top: Aside from negotiation--which is such a big topic, it’ll probably be addressed separately-- knowing how to communicate how rope feels on your body and where is important.  Just saying “This hurts a lot!” doesn’t help your Top adjust the tie in order to make it more tolerable.  Learning to identify exactly what doesn’t feel right and expressing it clearly and calmly will do wonders for increasing your longevity in rope.
• Communication with yourself: I don’t mean talking to yourself persay- it’s more about knowing how to communicate to yourself about where pain is, what kind of pain it is, and how to handle it.  This leads into our next tip...
• Knowing Your Own Body: There should never be a question when it comes to your health at all.  Grey areas aren’t cool and it isn’t fair to you or your rope Top to come to the table without knowing everything there is to know about yourself.  Several responses included things like knowing what parts of the body are sensitive and being able to communicate that.  Key things that knowing your body will allow you to do include:
• Creating ties that are tailored to you.  Once you know your body well enough, you can work with a rigger/rope Top in order to create ties that are designed to be challenging to your endurance, but not impossible.  M0co knows I have an extremely hard time with strappados/armbinders, so he and I spent a day testing our various versions to see if there were any types of ties that were more tolerable.  We eventually found a version of strappado that I can actually tolerate.  A rope Top never wants to make a bottom feel like a failure and will be more than happy to work on building up their repertoire.  Plus, it’s kinda cool to have a tie designed specifically for you :)
• Knowing a good pain from a bad pain. or any sensation for that matter. Understanding what a good pain, a bad pain or an unusual sensation is really important for endurance and prolonging play safely.  In my opinion good pain is one that you enjoy or is tolerable.  It tends to feel pretty terrible at first, but, for lack of a better word, it tends to even out as you stay in it.  A bad pain is something that doesn’t get better with time, need immediate attention and is usually (not always) unexpected. Spiral wrote this awesome explanation of a process called compartmentalization (or fragmentation) that ze uses.
Basically goes like this: I close my eyes, or just visually focus on nothing in particular, and instead focus on really feeling what's going on in my body. Check to feel my circulation, if anything is too tingly. I check to feel if I'm tensing up in a specific area, and focus on relaxing that area. Check to see (especially in a suspension) if one small area is taking what feels like too much weight or force, and try to adjust my body to make it more evenly distributed. Sometimes I can lean an imperceptible amount in one direction or another and it makes all the difference in the world. Taking little bits of time to focus on each of these small things helps me stay in stressful rope longer in the immediate situation, and also increases my awareness of my body so that in future play, I can recognize certain sensations and either alleviate them myself or alert my top if they become problematic.
It's important to notice that a lot of what ze is doing is checking in with hir body and communicating with hirself in order to communicate with hir Top, if needed. _Spiral_ needs to know hir body well enough in order to do so.  I use a strategy that’s very similar: when in a stressful tie, I try to do the following:
• Figure out where the most stress/pain I’m feeling.
• Gauge on whether this is a good pain or a bad pain.  I usually determine this on whether it’s getting worse with time- a few seconds is all I need to know.
• If it’s a good pain, I breathe through it.  I use Tifereth’s method of visualizing that I am putting the pain into a box in front of me, where I can see it.  This helps keep me calm.  If it’s a bad pain, I tell my partner as calmly as I can.

I hope that these tips are helpful to those looking to increase their stamina in bondage.  Granted, these aren’t the only ways up endurance, but they are ones that are constantly coming up.  If you have any other tips or tricks, please feel free to add to this list!

Happy bottoming :)

## Sunday, September 8, 2013

### ROPE MECCA SCHEDULE IS HERE!

With Rope Mecca just over 2 weeks away, I am pleased to present you with the official schedule of events. I’m particularly excited to have three great instructors who have never before taught in the DC/Baltimore area! Our area has seen an explosion of interest in rope bondage, and we're really excited to host the biggest educational event for what I see as arguably the biggest rope-centric city in the USA!

Rope Mecca Schedule of Events
9:00am - 10:00am: REGISTRATION / MEET 'N GREET (60 minutes)
Continental breakfast provided by M0co Jute
10:00am - 11:30am: CLASS SET 1 (90 minutes)
• Class: ve-ra
• Class: -EM-
• Open rope: DonSir
11:30am - 12:00pm: Break (30 minutes)
12:00pm - 1:30pm: CLASS SET 2 (90 minutes)
• Class: ve-ra
• Class: DonSir
• Open rope: -EM-
1:30pm - 3:00pm: Lunch / Break (90 minutes)
• Recommended that students return to GLS by 2:30 and use half hour to prepare for last class set
3:00pm - 4:30pm: CLASS SET 3
• Class: -EM-
• Class: DonSir
• Open rope: ve-ra
4:30pm - 6:00pm: Open Tie / Office hours
• All instructors and TAs available for ad hoc instruction/consultation
6:00pm - 8:00pm:Dinner / GLS Set-up for Kraken's Lair party
•  VENUE CLOSED TO ATTENDEES FOR PARTY SET-UP
8:00pm - 2:00am: Rope Mecca Play Party
Eventbrite page:
You must purchase tickets to ROPE MECCA through Eventbrite.
Informational e-mails will be sent via Eventbrite.
FetLife event page:
**Don't forget to RSVP using the Fetlife event page!
See ROPE MECCA class descriptions for:
Need a partner? Partner Search Thread!
Don't forget that Indecent Enterprises is giving away free tickets to Rope Mecca at their party on September 14th!
Have you heard about our friend, Rope Mecca? Rope Mecca is an all day and night Rope event that will include classes, discussions, well known riggers from across the country, an opportunity to make your own 20 minute rope demo reel, and plenty of opportunities to try out all your new ties and rope skills! Being such an amazing Friend of Indecent Enterprises, Rope Mecca has agreed to give every person that comes to the Extravaganza a raffle ticket entering them to win a full day Free ticket to Rope Mecca!! (a $100 value) BADASS members, don't forget that you get$5 off your registration fees! PM M0co if you need more information.icial Ro

## Tuesday, September 3, 2013

### Introduction: Rope Bottoming Skills

[Triggers warning: Feelings of inadequacy, not being good enough]

For the longest time I used get down on myself because I wasn’t flexible to make my elbows touch and since they couldn’t do that, I couldn’t possibly be a good rope bottom. I know dozens of rope bottoms who can’t do suspensions or can’t be in a TK. It makes you feel broken when those are the standards for being a good rope bottom and there’s almost nothing worse than feeling like a broken, untalented rope bottom. It got to the point where I didn’t want to be tied up because I was worried M0co (or any Top) would put me in strappado and watch me fail instantly, realize what I already knew (that I am the worst rope bottom EVER!) and no longer want to play with me.

It look several months (maybe even years) for me to understand that being able to do a certain tie doesn’t you a good or bad rope bottom; it just means you are capable of doing a specific tie. Being small/thin doesn’t make you a good rope bottom; it just means you are small/thin. Being a specific gender doesn’t make you a good rope bottom; it just means you are you. So what does it mean to be a good rope bottom? It means possessing skills like communication, endurance, and knowing your own body and health. It means being willing to put in the work to become better. So, with the help of my awesome rope community, I want to start a series of blogs about these skills, including helpful tips, hints, and ideas that may help a rope bottom better themselves.

Now, these are just some ideas that have worked for rope bottoms in our community. In no way am I saying that these are the ONLY skills or that these are tips you MUST follow. Everybody’s different and things that may work for one may not work for others. Please do not take anything written here as gospel. One of the biggest themes you’ll see in these writings is that YMMV (Your mileage may vary). Rope bottoming is a very personal thing and you should tailor your bottoming in a way that makes you happy and, of course, keeps you safe! That being said, I hope that the writings will be helpful to those out there interested in looking for helpful tidbits.

and please remember: you aren’t broken and you aren’t a bad rope bottom. You’re fabulous :)

## Sunday, September 1, 2013

### Runner 5, Business Cards and other things

I'm currently starting week four of my Zombies, Run! 5K trainer.  I really hate running with a passion- I'll never understand why people get such joy out of running great distances for no reason (aside from health reasons, I guess).

So what is 'Zombies, Run!'?  It's an android/Apple store app created by Six to Start.

It's pretty ingenious actually: instead of just telling you when to run or walk, this app sets up a detailed story line for you to follow: You are a new arrival to the Abel township after your plane crashes.  In order to get a productive member of this mid-zombie apocalyptic society, you've got to earn your keep.  Several of the runners (i.e. those who run outside of Abel to collect supplies that the township may need) are injured or have been killed off by zombs.  You're to replace Runner Five and Abel begins training you in order to do so.

As someone who hasn't stuck to any 5K program before (and I've tried many) I'm pretty excited I've made it to week four.  I'm about half way through the program I think and I'm running/walking an average of 5K three to five times a week.  I don't really know if I'm getting healthier, but I am having fun, which is rare.  I'm hoping that I can register for Run or Dye or The Electric Run in November,  I really want to say I have a 5K under my belt.  My eventual goal is to do an obstacle race like Warrior Dash (or even Tough Mudder someday!)

I think it was shot down 2-3 times by other companies for being too graphic.  In fact, I'm sure that blogspot will delete this for being too graphic.  We're hoping it brings more traffic to M0cojute.com.  I'm not sure many folks realize M0co's made a website now.  If you run into me or M0co in the near future, please remind us to give you some cards to pass out for us!  It would mean a lot to the both of us.

Vacation went extremely well- lots of sun and relaxation.  We even managed to squeeze in a photoshoot.  Some of the photos came out pretty well.  Here's my favorite:

I absolutely adored the lighting done for this.  It was worth getting sand in places where it didn't belong.

## Thursday, August 8, 2013

### Dirty Things August

Not much to say about Dirty Things; here are some photos that will probably be deleted because blogspot hates me:

Today is officially my Friday; M0co and I go on vacation this weekend!

## Saturday, August 3, 2013

### I don't know what to call this...an update?

Some days, I get really stuck in a vanilla rut.  I've been trapped working 12 hours a day for the past two days, stressing at work every 3 minutes that I'm going to be a citation for even looking at DNA incorrectly.  It's become increasingly obvious that our CAP inspection is coming up and the higher ups are starting to realize some stuff about work protocol is a little lax.  The dust collecting on some of the machines should have been an indicator, but nope, they sit in their offices, eating candies and gossiping, completely oblivious to...well, everything.
In other, more exciting, kink-related news, M0cojute.com is now a thing.  I've considered moving my blog over there, but I'm mighty lazy.  I might consider it while on vacation in about a week or so.  If you're interested in rope, you should purchase now, there's a 20% grand opening sale if you use the code augustsale54.  Jute rope for these prices, with a sale on top of it?  You would think that M0co's suffering from some kind of brain damage!  Sale only lasts until the 11th.  Then we go on vacation :)
We received our one piece mouth lock a few days ago.  It's created by the evil Mr. Leto and it's really just a fabulous torture device.  My mouth is strangely big for my head and a lot of times I can't find gags that fit me properly: they are usually way too small.  We occasionally run into the way too big gags and they're a bit frightening.  I just imagine a human being able to unhinge their jaw in the same manner snakes do to ingest pretty big prey.  Except prey in this instance is penis.
Speaking of penises, M0co ran into the issue with our old ring gag that his cock couldn't fit in it to face fuck properly.  I heard this was the case with a lot of ring gags.  Is that done on purpose?

Enter Mr. Leto's gag: it's a custom sized one piece gag that fits (somewhat) comfortably inside the mouth.  Once there, it can be opened wider to prevent the wearer from pushing it out.  More importantly, M0co's penis actually fits in it and allows him to face fuck!
Of course, in true M0co fashion, he tied my arms behind me and pulled my hair to control my head.  It was the fastest he's ever cum.
My only regret was eating chocolate immediately before using the gag.  Brown drool is decidedly unsexy to me.

## Friday, July 5, 2013

### [Insert Semi-Depressing Title Here]

My love for this blog is quickly dying; I'm starting to really dislike the fact that blogspot seems to want to get rid of my photos, even the ones that have no nudity in it.  'Sup with that, blogspot?  Why you hatin'?  There's a good chance I may end up switching blogging sites if this keeps up.  Everyone keeps recommending Wordpress, I might have to check it out.

Aside from that, my days are kind of a messy jumble of work and doing stuff to get ready for some major rope events in the area.  Aside from some intensives that Cannon and Tifereth are doing this month, M0co has decided that he wants to throw a larger than usual rope education slash party day called 'Rope Mecca'.  I've been trying to lock down tons of logistics for him, but, as many folks know, trying to organize and herd kinky folk is akin to herding cats.  It's damn near impossible.  Plus, I'm highly allergic to cats.

I haven't had a lot of time to really sit and process my own thoughts and feelings and it's starting to really show.  I wish I had the vocabulary to accurately put down what I'm feeling but, it's just so damn hard right now.  It's days like this that I want to blog the most and think, "I probably shouldn't, it'll be quite a boring and depressing read."

Instead, I pose a random question to everyone out there in internet world: How important is your happiness to you in relation to someone else?  Not just anyone else, but someone you love for deeply?  Without getting into too many details, I'm struggling with finding a balance.

How does one find balance?

## Wednesday, May 8, 2013

### Grove Lane Studio's "Decadent and Dark Day of Photography"

Last Sunday, Grove Lane Studios held it's second photography day.  It consists of allowing photographers access to tons of models and kinky situations.  M0co, of course, was asked to come tie up models and make them all pretty for photos.

He did a great job, like always.  One of the girls seemed to genuinely be into it, in fact.  It took quite a bit for me to work on my jealousy, but I think, in the end, I was able to remind myself that M0co loves me and this is his job.  and it also helped that he made it a bit more mechanical since these girls were pretty much strangers to him.  Once I got over the initial insecurity ("They're prettier than I am...they're thinner than I am..."), I was able to actually enjoy the beauty of what M0co can do with rope and a body.

Interestingly, M0co somehow convinced Grove Lane to let me be a model- he told them if they wanted authentic, energy driven rope work and suspension work, he needed to use someone he knows extremely well (M0co didn't suspend any of the models because they had never been in rope before.)  He told me to bring my kimono and throw on some make-up and see what we could do.

I don't know what I'm doing with make-up.  Like...at all.  If anyone has make-up tips, suggestions, or basic how-tos, please share!

It didn't feel like a photoshoot; it felt like we got to play with photographers around.  It reminded me of all those Osada Steve videos I have where we can watch Osada Steve tie, but can hear the camera shutters in the background.  It was a completely different experience.

One of the photographers, Fetlife's DescreetPhotog, sent M0co some photos already and he fell in love with them.  I have yet to see what the other photographers came up with, but I'm pretty excited about it.

Here's a shot or two from DescreetPhotog:

I really like how this photo captures out dynamic.  It's rare we get photos with both of us together - M0co's usually operating a cracked cell phone.  Plus, wearing even a little bit of make-up really changes a photo.  I'm glad I forced myself to do so.

## Tuesday, April 30, 2013

### Experimenting with Synthetics

We recently procured some glow in the dark polypropylene rope from Harbor Freight.  We wanted to actually see what tying with something other than jute would be like.  It was definitely...an experience.

Two weeks ago, we headed to Perv and a Half Studios and experimented with the synthetic ropes.  I know that we were planning on bringing it to DO:Fusion so we can do black light rigging.  We learned a couple of really valuable lessons that day:

Synthetic rope burns super...fucking fast.  Daddy is one who typically likes to rig really quickly, but he had to slow his pace waaaaaaaaaay down to prevent burning his hands and myself.  I was really relieved to have clothes on (for once)

Synthetics have quite a bit of stretch.  Under the same tensions, the same ties done in jute would have been extremely snug and secure.  I could feel the synthetic loosening on me and there was a bit of bounce when I was in the air.  It was a totally new sensation. Me no likey.

It's not like we didn't already know these lessons, but we had never actually experienced them before since M0co has never tied with anything BUT jute.  I guess it has been a while since I owned shoes with laces...

Here are some photos taken by our friend, LePetitChaton.

Overall, it felt as if I had cheated on a loyal, loving partner with his younger, flashier sibling.

## Sunday, March 24, 2013

### Impact of Memphis, Here We Come!

I haven't updated in a while...life's been kind of strange recently.  In vanilla world, I have a full time day job now.  That stops me from being able to write in my dirty little blog because sites with adult content are prohibited.  I do love working, though.  Feels nice to not be a scrub.

Daddy has been busily making jute rope; it's become quite popular with riggers in the states.  We're selling something like 3-7 sets of rope a week :)  The extra income is very welcome.  It's actually gotten to the point where I asked Daddy to quit his actual job and make rope full time.  He's really considering it and will probably make a decision by next weekend.  He says it requires a lot of trust in his partner (meaning me) in order for him to do something like this.  I take that as a good sign :)

This Easter weekend, Daddy and I will be in Memphis to do our first out of state performance.  I'm not sure why it makes me so nervous to know it's a performance: it's something I've done a million times at play parties in the area.  Just the idea that people will have certain expectations makes me...I don't know...giddy. Nervous.  Excited.  Did I mention nervous?  I've been speaking with Clover about it and she gave me tons of awesome advice.  Still nervous, though.

If anyone of my readers (all 16 of you?) are in the Memphis area, please come by!  There's to be a high protocol dinner beforehand and a funtimes play party afterwards.  We'll also be vending some of our rope...because...we have to pay for this trip somehow :D

## Tuesday, February 26, 2013

### A Little Known Skill Called 'Bottoming'

I've been spending the last few weeks trying to get excited about education in the kink world.  Right before Dark Odyssey: Winter Fire, I spent a solid hour thumbing through the presenters and seeing what classes were being offered.  After DO:WF, I spent a few minutes trying to see if Shibaricon had their class list up.

Instead of excitement for new learning and furthering myself in kink, I got a serious case of the crankies.

Most skill based classes (i.e. Basics of Needle Play, Electrical Play, Intermediate Bondage etc) only ever talk about the skill from the Top side.  How to handle a needle, how to zap someone properly, a cool new tie.  Requirements for anything above beginner classes always have requirements...of the Top.  There's almost no mention of the bottom, as if they aren't even a part of the equation.

News flash: I am not replaceable and I am a huge part of the equation.  Maybe even the biggest part of the equation.

The kink world has spent so much time putting emphasis on Top skills that it often forgets that bottoming is a skill.  It's a skill that can be taught in class and gained through experiment.  It's a skill that, sadly, no one really teaches.  Most classes are geared towards Tops and when bottoms attend, they just kind of push them wherever they manage to fit.  In fact, with the growing rope community in this area, I notice we actually have more bottoms and switches than Tops, yet not enough education to balance that.

How am I (and others) supposed to evolve with our Tops if no one teaches us?  Are we supposed to just trial and error it and hope that as the Top grows we will, too?  And what about those bottoms who don't have a single Top, or not Top at all?  Are they just supposed to take it and hope that the Top's skill will take care of the rest?

It don't work that way.

Last year, at Shibaricon, there was a class advertised as "Advanced Transition Suspensions"  It was the first of its kind being taught at Shibaricon and, granted, there were going to be a lot of bumps.  Smartly, the educators of the class created a list of requirements for attending this class in an attempt to weed out those who weren't ready for such a complicated topic.  The problem is that each of these requirements were for the Top only.  In the end, I'm told that several bottoms had to drop out because they weren't ready for what was coming.

Now, I don't blame Shibaricon at all: it was their first time doing something of this caliber and there were going to be tons of snafus and hiccups.  It's a learning experience, right?

A lot of folks don't realize that there's a specialized set of skills needed for dynamic rope suspension bottoming: pain-processing, conditioning, stretching and, of course, communication.  and a lot of these skills carry over into other forms of bottoming.  It took me forever to piece together some semblance of what skills I needed besides communication and 'looking pretty' in rope.

I think from this point, I'm going to start blogging and recording my evolution as a bottom as to keep a record on skills I've picked up or learned that others may find helpful.  I don't want to complain without at least giving a resolution.

I also have been contacting others about the idea of teaching bottoming classes.  I'm really excited to hear their responses.

## Wednesday, February 20, 2013

### One month piercing check in

It's been a few days over a month since I decided it would be a good idea to upgrade my vagina with tons of piercings (check out my piercing review here),  The healing went extraordinarily well, especially since I didn't have any pesky problems like going to work.  I just pretty much lounged at home all week in some yoga pants and very unsexy underwear (or maybe slightly sexy underwear, depending on what mood you're currently in).

I would say the worst part of the healing was accidentally pulling healing skin and scabs back inside of yourself.  Definitely the worst on day 3.

BUT OH MAN. These things were totally worth it.  My orgasms are more intense.  Sex is incredibly hot.  and having someone go down on you and gently suck on those labia piercings? I'm getting turned on just thinking about it.

Chastity never looked hotter.  Also, pretty amped I was able to shave half-way decently around all those obstacles.

## Sunday, January 20, 2013

### I'm a Brave Little Toaster- A Review on My Genital Piercings

The last time I was pierced I was in the second grade: I was getting my ears done.  It was not by choice: my mom thought I would look really cute with earrings and my aunts (all 15 of them) kept buying me earrings and getting upset with me for not having holes in order to wear them.  I barely remember that experience except for the feelings of nerves and excitement bubbling away in my stomach.

That’s exactly how I felt this morning when I woke up: all nerves and excitement.

For the past year or so, I’ve been toying with the idea of getting a triangle piercing (What is a triangle?).   After doing a lot of research and getting scared because almost every experience I read about said it was incredibly painful and one girl who told me she had to get it done TWICE and it still migrated, I decided to give it a shot.  It seemed like the majority of people who had theirs done fell in love with it regardless of the initial pain of the needle.

As a last minute addition, I also decided I wanted to get my labia pierced.  Daddy and I really love the look of them and my room-mate got hers done so I plied her with a million questions about the pain level and healing (“Yes, they really fucking hurt.  Good luck.”)  I originally wanted to do 3 on each side of the outer labia, 6 total, but chickened out and decided 1 on each side, 2 total, would be more than enough.  I also toyed with the idea of doing the triangle first and labia after, but the idea of having that much healing time (and no sex) was extra unappealing.  Might as well get it done all at once!

For my piercings, I went to the only man I trust: Moose B.Almighty at Time Bomb Tattoo.  Moose has a ridiculous amount of experience with genital piercings and is super professional in his work.  He checked my anatomy a few months prior to make sure I was a candidate.  After a quick inspection and a tiny anatomy lesson to all my friends who happened to be there as well, Moose declared that my anatomy would work just fine with a triangle.

The worst part is the waiting and measuring- my overactive imagination went crazy.  I imagined me crying, kicking and screaming and demanding no more.  I imagined leaving with uneven piercings or injuries.  I was worried that I would be so scared I would pee on the table and Moose.  Moose, being the awesome perfectionist he is, spent the majority of time talking to me about what was about to happen while he prepped me for piercings: he applied tons of various cleaners with q-tips, measured and marked me with one of those pens used for surgeries.  He showed me with a mirror to see if I was happy with the placement and proceeded to pierce.

We did the triangle first since it requires the most concentration and having other rings in the way would make it so much tougher.  Moose used a clamp to ensure everything was in the right place and pierced me with a 14 gauge needle.  The needle itself wasn't bad at all; the pain came from using a stretcher tool to bring the hole up to a 12 gauge for the ring.  The pain wasn't unbearable, just surprising, intense for a few seconds and a bit disconcerting to feel something stretching underneath your skin.  The triangle was quick, less than 2 minutes total to do.  Moose used a curved barbell and carefully tucked the ends of the ring into my labia folds to prevent them from getting snagged on anything.  The labia were done in the same manner, using 12-gauge needles and 10-gauge jewelry.  The jewelry used was a ring with a capture bead.

So now I’m all shiny and the labia rings clink lightly when they rub against one another.  Everything feels pretty solid at the moment.  I am walking a little strangely at the moment, but I think that’s just a mental thing.  No bleeding, no funny business, no one got peed on! Success!

The piercings feel amazing and I wish I could have sex at the moment, but Daddy says I can’t for sanitary reasons.  Daddy also said that everything only feels erotic at the moment, but once I start healing, it’ll be another story.  I’ll be sure to update.

Moose said the piercings went really smoothly, textbook even.  Of course it would, I’m a good robot- I’m technically sound :D

Here’s a picture of the piercings (photo editing done by Hamsandwich).  I have to spread the lips a bit so you can see the triangle- it’s pretty hidden normally.